I found this picture on e-bay. I can only imagine who picked this one out. I'll just make up a story. Here goes.
The bride was flat chested. God bless her, she finally found a guy who was blind in one eye. I guess he had no depth perception and didn't care.
The bride knew what was going on though. She chose these dresses so that all of the bridesmaids had to keep our boobs out of the photos.
I have never felt so unattractive in my entire life. I looked for a totally blind guy to dance with. I figured he wouldn't be fooled by the optical illusion. He would feel around there and notice I had something to be proud of.
Instead, I sat at the head table all night. No one asked me to dance. My two friends lefty and righty and I had a terrible time.